Closer to Fine

Yay! Yay! Yay! I feel like we are on our way. We haven't signed anything official yet, but we both loved today's presentation. One of our priest friends (not adopting) was even there with a friend of hers! Was it a sign? Hopefully we'll be able to go back this week to meet with this attorney and talk about our particular situation....

We heard from a birthmother, from a set of new parents whose baby is just five weeks old (he was so tiny!), and from the attorney who started this firm. Such an emotional day. The birthmother was about what I expected. She was 24, got pregnant while in school, is still in school, kept her pregnancy a secret for the most part, and still thinks about the little girl she gave up - but knows that she made the right decision and has never regretted it. She said she hopes one day that she'll get married and have kids and be able to give them all the opportunities that this little girl has now. The parents who just adopted were great, too. Also - about what I expected. They went to Michigan for the birth of their son. They had a fantastic experience with the birth mother and her family.

We learned that the success rate for first time placement is 92%. What happens to the other 8%? They match the second time. What does a failed match look like? (This was my question - I wanted to know at what point do things "fail".) Well, it could be a week after you've met a birthmom she changes her mind - or it could be at the hospital - or it could be the adoptive couple changes their mind.

What's important to keep in mind is that the right baby is out there for us. 92 + 8 = 100% success rate. The average wait time is 6-12 months. Could be less, could be more. For the most part, it depends on our criteria. We're still deciding some of it - but we do know that we are open to a boy or girl. (Pick yourselves up off the floor). The main reason for this is that 60% of birthmoms don't find out the sex of the baby. That leaves 40% who know = 20% girls + 20% boys. Limiting ourselves to 20% of birthmoms without even factoring in any other criteria is silly. Maybe the second go around if we adopt again.

The attorney urged everyone to resist the urge to buy a crib, decorate a nursery, or have three baby showers. He also encouraged us not to tell everyone when we're matched. He said only 50% of clients take his advice. I think we'll take part of that advice. Most of you know that there is a reasonable collection of tiny clothing here already - along with a few other small items. Now that I've started this blog, I think it will be hard not to let all of you know if we get matched. In fact, I want you all there with us as we work our way through this! (in spirit, I mean.) All of your thoughts and prayers will help us become the family we are meant to be. We can have a party later. :)

The mom I met yesterday told me that she's having a Sip 'n' See this weekend, a southern tradition, she said (?). You sip iced tea and see the baby. I'm sure I was making some sort of strange face at her. Really?? I've been to lots of baby showers, but in all my sippin' and seein' years back home - I never heard of that. So - I googled, got various ideas and origins for Sip n See, and it seems to be the way to go - especially for an adoption situation. Heads up - a Sip n See might be in your future.

Closer to Fine http://www.jango.com/music/Indigo+Girls?l=0

Well, I just clicked on the above link, and it didn't take me where I thought it would - but this will definitely take you to "Closer to Fine" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HUgwM1Ky228